The Joy Of Drinking

Is Barely Contained

Forgetting Your Dog On Bring Your Dog To Work Day

Depression and Human Disconnection Ensues

Poisonous Iguana Impression

With Red Anger Warnings

Red Falcon Garb

With Sharpened Talons Protruding

Moments Before A Vicious Attack

Calculating The Best Suffocation Technique

Cramming Down The Last Piece

Of A Dehydrated Lamb Composite Sandwich

My Name Is Morgan

And I'm An Aeronausiphobic

Slithering Into The Darkness

(Carolina Rattler Sounds)

Christmas Turtle Neck Sweater Junkie

And Egg Nog Addict

You Ain't Nothing But A Hoochie Mama

Hoodrat Hoodrat Hoochie Mama

Ghost Imitation

With Added Red Eye Scare Tactic

Social Ineptitude

Triggers Slight Facial Paralysis

Miniscule Dinner Portions

Because Nothing Tastes As Good As Being Skinny

Evil Is a Predominant Gene

In A Young Redheaded Middle Child

Drinking Makes Life More Fun

Especially When You're By Yourself